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Highly recommended

The Coaching Habit

Say Less, Ask More & Change the Way You Lead Forever

by Michael Bungay Stanier

Seven essential questions that help managers coach in ten minutes or less, by saying less and asking more.

  • Published 2016
  • Easy read
  • Practical guidance
  • 2 min analysis
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Introduction

Michael Bungay Stanier, a coach and founder of a training company, wrote The Coaching Habit in 2016. He argues that managers often give advice too quickly, and that building a habit of asking good questions makes teams more capable and managers less overwhelmed.

The book offers seven questions and explains how to make coaching an everyday habit.

Who should read this book?

Managers, team leads, parents and anyone who tends to jump in with advice.

Helps with: Communicate and persuade, Lead and grow at work

The central message

Stay curious a little longer and rush to advice a little more slowly. Seven questions make coaching quick and effective.

Key ideas and concepts

  1. The kickstart question

    'What's on your mind?' opens focused conversations.

  2. The AWE question

    'And what else?' draws out more ideas and slows your advice.

  3. The focus question

    'What's the real challenge here for you?'

  4. The foundation and lazy questions

    'What do you want?' and 'How can I help?'

  5. The strategic and learning questions

    'If you're saying yes to this, what are you saying no to?' and 'What was most useful for you?'

Deeper analysis

The Coaching Habit is short, practical and immediately usable. Its seven questions are memorable, and the advice to tame your 'advice monster' resonates with many managers. It builds on habit research to make coaching part of everyday conversations.

It's light on deeper coaching theory and situations where advice is genuinely needed. Some readers find the tone breezy. But for busy managers, it's one of the most useful books available.

Practical applications

  • Start a one-on-one with 'What's on your mind?'
  • Ask 'And what else?' before offering advice.
  • Ask 'What's the real challenge here for you?'
  • End conversations with 'What was most useful?'
  • Notice when your 'advice monster' takes over.

Your 7-day action plan

  1. Day 1

    Learn the seven questions.

  2. Day 2

    Use the kickstart question.

  3. Day 3

    Use 'And what else?' three times.

  4. Day 4

    Ask the focus question.

  5. Day 5

    Ask 'How can I help?'

  6. Day 6

    Use the learning question.

  7. Day 7

    Reflect on how conversations changed.

Outcomes to expect

What readers who apply this book can realistically take away from it:

  • Better coaching conversations
  • Less advice-giving
  • More capable team members
  • Less manager overwhelm

Strengths and limitations

Strengths

  • Short and practical
  • Memorable questions
  • Immediately usable
  • Builds coaching habits

Limitations

  • Light on coaching theory
  • Breezy tone
  • Less on when advice is needed

Reflection questions

  1. Do you give advice too quickly?
  2. What questions do you ask most?
  3. How could you stay curious longer?
  4. What's the real challenge for your team?

About the author

Michael Bungay Stanier

Coach and author of The Coaching Habit.

Full profile and books

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Book details (title, author, year) are factual. Everything under the headings above is MindsetProdigy's own editorial analysis and interpretation, written to help you decide whether to read the book and how to apply it. It is not a substitute for reading the book itself. Last updated September 30, 2026.